well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize