so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
