hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
