Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Randomize
