just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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