Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize