I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
