Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
