I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
