Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
