can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
