I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
