Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry GimmeSunglasses hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(614): View more from Ohio

What tipped you off? The sombrero?

Fav 11 4999 915
share tweet
(678): View more from Georgia

Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about

Fav 32 8109 1354
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(614): View more from Ohio

My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.

Fav 12 1062 5350
share tweet
(407): View more from Florida

She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.

Fav 7 3317 1646
share tweet
(228): View more from Mississippi

For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.

Fav 10 2029 3359
share tweet
(402): View more from Nebraska

I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth

Fav 24 1926 3749
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(630): View more from Illinois

i think the doormans mad at me

(773): View more from Illinois

well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...

Fav 12 1588 2827
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(716): View more from New York

I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out

Fav 0 598 457
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(843): View more from South Carolina

So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?

Fav 0 37 4
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT