I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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