i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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