fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
