So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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