so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
