Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
