The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Can you bring me the toilet please
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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