her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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