Three words: puerto rican gang bang
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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