I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
