There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
