Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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