No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize