how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
should my penis look like a turkey
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize