Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Welp...herpes.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
he was CRYING into my vagina
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
