she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Life is so much better after having sex.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
