once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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