just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
