There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
