Sponge bath it is.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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