Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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