dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
