best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
