What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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