Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
