i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize
