When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
