Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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