i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
