Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
