i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
