cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Randomize
