i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize