we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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