Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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