Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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