I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
